Loney nights

Boy, let me tell you... Without my husband here, by my side... my nights have become more and more lonely by the day... sometimes I feel as though I will go insane without him here.. but I know he will return very soon! I miss him dearly and cannot wait to see him again! It's soo exciting just to think about it! I do love him very much and I can tell he loves me too! <3 Hes so good to me! He's the best man I have ever been with, and I thank God every day for bringing him to me!

With that said...

Yesterday I think I successfully meditated a more proper way than my first attempt... and I seen the most strangest vision. It was of these arms that were blue in color, and had a light coverage of fur on them. The hands of the arms were reaching over me as if keeping me from seeing something... I am not sure what that message was about though... it was interesting. I asked Gabriel if he heard of anything like that, and he said it sounded nothing that he knew about. So yeah...

This past day I have been suffering from anxiety and depression very much so, and have needed love very much so as well. It's hard living on your own sometimes.. But I don't regret it. And I won't be alone for too much longer and I know when my husband comes back that everything will be right in my world.

As soon as my funding is available, I plan to set up an alter to thank the angels and invite them in my home. I think it would be good to surround myself with angelic like things and to share my love for angels. Infact I feel very inspired to draw, and get back into music again. Just yesterday, I wrote to the director of the Carrollton Sympathy Orchestra to find out what all I would need to do in order to join them. I miss being in my school's orchestra and I think this has been the reason behind part of my depression. I regret leaving music behind me, and I should of pursued it. But eventually I will have it back in my life and I will be happy again. Maybe after I graduate from the online university I am attending right now, I will go back to school for music, if anything just to surround myself in music again. I really really miss it and hope that I can get into the orchestra again. So my fellow readers, please pray for me that I get in. It is something that I desperately need in my life, to make it balanced again. For now I have been working on learning new songs for the piano, though I am not very good. Maybe after my husband gets a teacher's job, I can see about getting lessons later on.

Bless your heart, and bless your soul!

~Brenda